somewhere at a sudo-military base in the middle of the West Virginia Mountains.

8:59pm **phone rings**

Hello, this Sargent so and so, is this _______ ________?

Um yes.

Yes, I’m calling on behalf of ______ _______. Do you know him?

Uh Yes sir, is everything alright?

he’s interviewing to join the department

Okay

Okay, let me ask you a few questions here, I know it’s 9:00p on a Wednesday night, So I’ll try and make this quick and painless.

Perfect.

How do you know ________? How did you meet him? What do you have to say about him?

Well we met in college. lived with him. We did art together. I can say that he is a very loyal person and temperamentally I think would be well fitted to do the kind of work you guys do.

Art? Hmm…Listen art shows and our line of work don’t fly super well…

Okay

Yah like, I don’t need a bunch of free thinking

Elaborate please

How about this. Tell me the bad things about him. Is he a creep. Has he ever said anything alarming to you?

uh No and no. he’s a good person.

I mean I need someone who isn’t going to go through our whole academy and then turn out to be some f*ckin weirdo

Ha, of course, I think I know what you mean.

So excuse me for asking all the hard questions up front.

No problem at all

Our academy is like a paramilitary organization son. We’re more like entering in the army to go to war then any rinky dink local police station. These people need to go to war. You think this guy can handle war?

Well let me tell you a story.

Okay.